This was probably written by Simone Weil in
April, 1942, and sent to Father Perrin, when he was Superior of the Dominicans of Montpellier, in
order to help the Catholic students with whom he was in contact.
The Key to a Christian conception
of studies is the realization that prayer consists of attention. It is the orientation of all the attention of
which the soul is capable towards God.
The quality of attention counts for much in the quality of
the prayer. Warmth of heart cannot make up for it.
It is the highest part of the attention only
which makes contact with God, when prayer is intense and pure enough for such a contact to be
established; but the whole attention is turned
towards God.
Of course school
exercises only develop a lower kind of attention. Nevertheless they are extremely effective in increasing the power of attention which
will be available at the time of
prayer, on condition that they are carried out with a view
to this purpose and this purpose alone.
Although people seem
to be unaware of it to-day, the development of the faculty of attention forms the real object and almost the sole interest
of studies. Most school tasks have a certain intrinsic interest as well, but such an interest is
secondary. All tasks which really call upon the power of attention are interesting for the same
reason and to an almost equal degree.
School children and
students who love God should never say: “For my part I like mathematics”; “I like French”; “I like Greek.” They should
learn to like all these subjects, because all of them develop that faculty of attention which,
directed towards God, is the very
substance of prayer.
If we have no
aptitude or natural taste for geometry this does not mean that our faculty for attention
will not be developed by wrestling with a problem or studying a theorem. On the
contrary it is almost an advantage.
It does not even
matter much whether we succeed in finding the solution or understanding the
proof, although it is important to try really hard to do so. Never in any case whatever
is a genuine effort of the attention wasted. It always has its effect on the
spiritual plane and in consequence on the lower one of the intelligence, for
all spiritual light lightens the mind.
If we concentrate our attention on trying to
solve a problem of geometry, and if at the end of an hour we are no nearer to doing so than at the
beginning, we have nevertheless been making progress each minute of that hour in another more mysterious
dimension. Without our knowing or feeling it, this apparently barren effort has brought
more light into the soul. The result will one day be discovered in prayer. Moreover it may very likely
be felt besides in some department of the intelligence in no way connected with
mathematics. Perhaps he who made the unsuccessful effort will one day be able to grasp the
beauty of a line of Racine more vividly
on account of it. But it is certain that this effort will
bear its fruit in prayer. There is no doubt whatever about that.
Certainties of this
kind are experimental. But if we do not believe in them before experiencing them, if at least we do not behave as though we
believed in them, we shall never have the experience which leads to such certainties. There
is a kind of contradiction here.
Above a given level this is the case with all useful
knowledge concerning spiritual progress. If we do not regulate our conduct by it before having proved
it, if we do not hold on to it for a long
time only by faith, a faith at first stormy and without
light, we shall never transform it into certainty. Faith is the indispensable condition.
The best support for
faith is the guarantee that if we ask our Father for bread, he does not give us a stone. Quite apart from explicit religious belief,
every time that a human being succeeds in making an effort of attention with the sole idea
of increasing his grasp of truth, he acquires a greater aptitude for grasping it, even if his
effort produces no visible fruit. An Eskimo story explains the origin of light as follows: “In
the eternal darkness, the crow, unable to
find any food, longed for light, and the earth was
illumined.” If there is a real desire, if the thing desired is really light, the desire for light produces it.
There is a real desire when there is an
effort of attention. It is really light that is desired if
all other incentives are absent. Even if our efforts of attention seem for years to be producing no
result, one day a light which is in exact
proportion to them will flood the soul. Every effort adds a
little gold to a treasure which no power on earth can take away. The useless efforts made by
the Curé d’Ars, for long and painful years, in his attempt to learn Latin bore
fruit in the marvelous discernment which enabled him to see the very soul of
his penitents behind their words and even their silences.
Students must
therefore work without any wish to gain good marks, to pass examinations, to win school successes; without any reference to their
natural abilities and tastes; applying themselves equally to all their tasks, with the idea that
each one will help to form in them the habit of that attention which is the substance of prayer.
When we set out to do a piece of work, it is necessary to wish to do it correctly, because such a
wish is indispensable if there is to be true effort. Underlying this immediate objective, however, our
deep purpose should aim solely at increasing the power of attention with a view to prayer; as,
when we write, we draw the shape of the letter on paper, not with a view to the shape, but with
a view to the idea we want to express.
To make this the sole and exclusive purpose of our studies
is the first condition to be observed if we are to put them to the right use.
The second condition
is to take great pains to examine squarely and to contemplate attentively and slowly each school task in which we have
failed, seeing how unpleasing and
second-rate it is, without seeking any excuse or overlooking
any mistake or any of our tutor’s corrections, trying to get down to the origin of each fault.
There is a great temptation to do the opposite, to give a sideways glance at the corrected
exercise if it is bad, and to hide it forthwith.
Most of us do this nearly always. We have to withstand this
temptation. Incidentally, moreover, nothing is more necessary for academic success,
because, despite all our efforts, we work without making much progress when we refuse to give our
attention to the faults we have made and our tutor’s corrections.
Above all it is thus
that we can acquire the virtue of humility, and that is a far more precious treasure than all academic progress. From this
point of view it is perhaps even more useful to contemplate our stupidity than our sin.
Consciousness of sin gives us the feeling that we are evil, and a kind of pride sometimes finds a place in
it. When we force ourselves to fix the gaze, not only of our eyes but of our souls, upon a
school exercise that we have failed through sheer stupidity, a sense of our mediocrity is borne
in upon us with irresistible evidence.
No knowledge is more to be desired. If we can arrive at
knowing this truth with all our souls we shall be well established on the right foundation.
If these two
conditions are perfectly carried out there is no doubt that school studies are quite as good a road to sanctity as any other.
To carry out the
second, it is enough to wish to do so. This is not the case with the first. In order really to pay attention, it is necessary to know
how to set about it.
Most often attention
is confused with a kind of muscular effort. If one says to one’s pupils: “Now you must pay attention,” one sees them
contracting their brows, holding their breath, stiffening their muscles. If after two minutes they
are asked what they have been paying attention to, they cannot reply. They have not been paying
attention. They have been ontracting their muscles.
We often expend this
kind of muscular effort on our studies. As it ends by making us tired, we have the impression that we have been working. That
is an illusion. Tiredness has nothing to do with work. Work itself is the useful effort,
whether it is tiring or not. This kind
of muscular effort in work is entirely barren, even if it is
made with the best of intentions. Good intentions in such cases are among those that pave the way
to hell. Studies conducted in such a
way can sometimes succeed academically from the point of
view of gaining good marks and passing examinations, but that is in spite of the effort and
thanks to natural gifts; moreover such studies are never of any use.
Will power, the kind
that, if need be, makes us set our teeth and endure suffering, is the principal weapon of the apprentice engaged in manual work.
But contrary to the usual belief, it has practically no place in study. The intelligence can only
be led by desire. For there to be desire, there must be pleasure and joy in the work. The
intelligence only grows and bears fruit in joy. The joy of learning is as indispensable in study as
breathing is in running. Where it is
lacking there are no real students, but only poor
caricatures of apprentices who, at the end of their apprenticeship, will not even have a trade.
It is the part played
by joy in our studies that makes of them a preparation for spiritual life, for desire directed towards God is the only power
capable of raising the soul. Or rather, it is God alone who comes down and possesses the soul, but
desire alone draws God down. He only comes to those who ask him to come; and he cannot
refuse to come to those who implore him long, often and ardently.
Attention is an
effort, the greatest of all efforts perhaps, but it is a negative effort. Of itself, it does not involve tiredness. When we become tired,
attention is scarcely possible any more, unless we have already had a good deal of practice. It
is better to stop working altogether, to seek some relaxation, and then a little later to return
to the task; we have to press on and loosen up alternately, just as we breathe in and out.
Twenty minutes of
concentrated, untired attention is infinitely better than three hours of the kind of frowning application which leads us to say with
a sense of duty done: “I have worked well!”
But, in spite of all
appearances, it is also far more difficult. There is something in our soul which has a far more violent repugnance for true
attention than the flesh has for bodily fatigue. This is something is much more closely connected with
evil than is the flesh. That is why every time that we really concentrate our attention, we
destroy the evil in ourselves. If we concentrate with this intention, a quarter of an hour of
attention is better than a great many good works.
Attention consists of
suspending our thought, leaving it detached, empty and ready to be penetrated by the object. It means holding in our minds,
within reach of this thought, but on a lower level and not in contact with it, the diverse
knowledge we have acquired which we are forced to make use of. Our thought should be in relation to
all particular and already formulated thoughts as a man on a mountain who, as he looks forward,
sees also below him, without actually looking at them, a great many forests and plains. Above all
our thought should be empty, waiting, not seeking anything, but ready to receive in its
naked truth the object which is to penetrate it.
All wrong
translations, all absurdities in geometry problems, all clumsiness of style and all faulty connection of ideas in compositions and essays,
all such things are due to the fact that
thought has seized upon some idea too hastily and being thus
prematurely blocked, is not open to the truth. The cause is always that we have wanted to be too
active; we have wanted to carry
out a search. This can be proved every time, for every
fault, if we trace it to its root. There is no better exercise than such a tracing down of our faults,
for this truth is one those which we can
only believe when we have experienced it hundreds and thousands
of times. This is the way with all essential truths.
We do not obtain the
most precious gifts by going in search of them but by waiting for them. Man cannot discover them by his own powers and if he
sets out to seek for them he will
find in their place counterfeits of which he will be unable
to discern the falsity.
The solution of a
geometry problem does not in itself constitute a precious gift, but the same law applies to it because it is the image of something
precious. Being a little fragment of particular truth, it is a pure image of the unique, eternal
and living Truth, the very Truth which once in a human voice declared “I am the Truth.”
Every school
exercise, thought of in this way, is like a sacrament.
In every school
exercise there is a special way of waiting upon truth, setting our hearts upon it, yet not allowing ourselves to go out in search of
it. There is a way of giving our attention to the data of a problem in geometry without
trying to find the solution, or to the words of a Latin or Greek text without trying to arrive at the
meaning, a way of waiting, when we are writing, for the right word to come of itself at the end of
our pen, while we merely reject all
inadequate words.
Our first duty
towards school-children and students is to make known this method to them, not only in a general way but in the particular form
which bears in each exercise. It is not only the duty of those who teach them, but also of their
spiritual guides. Moreover the latter should bring out in a brilliantly clear light the
correspondence between the attitude of the intelligence in each one of these exercises and the position
of the soul, which, with its lamp well filled with oil, awaits the Bridegrooms’s coming with
confidence and desire. May each loving adolescent, as he works at his Latin prose, hope through
this prose to come a little nearer to the instant when he will really be the slave – faithfully
waiting while the master is absent, watching and listening – ready to open the door to him as soon as he
knocks. The master will then make
his slave sit down and himself serve him with meat.
Only this waiting,
this attention, can move the master to treat his slave with such amazing tenderness. When the slave has worn himself out in the
fields, his master says on his return: “Prepare my meal, and wait upon me.” And he considers the
servant who only does what he is told to do to be unprofitable. To be sure in the realm of
action we have to do all that is demanded of us, no matter what effort, weariness and
suffering it may cost, for he who disobeys does not love; but after that we are only unprofitable
servants. Such service is a condition of love, but it is not enough. The thing which forces the master
to make himself the slave of his
slave, and to love him, has nothing to do with all that.
Still less is it the result of a search which the servant might have been bold enough to undertake on his
own initiative. It is only watching,
waiting, attention.
Happy then are those
who pass their adolescence and youth in developing this power of attention. No doubt they are no nearer to goodness than
their brothers working in fields and factories. They are near in a different way. Peasants and
workmen possess a nearness to God of incomparable savour which is found in the depths of
poverty, in the absence of social consideration and in the endurance of long drawn-out
sufferings. If however we consider the occupation in themselves, studies are nearer to God because
of the attention which is their soul. Whoever goes through years of study without developing this
attention within himself has lost a
great treasure.
Not only does the
love of God have attention for its substance; the love of our neighbour, which we know to be the same love, is made of this same
substance. Those who are unhappy have no need for anything in this world but people capable
of giving them their attention. The capacity to give one’s attention to a sufferer is a very
rare and difficult thing; it is almost a miracle; it is a miracle. Nearly all those who think they
have this capacity do not possess it. Warmth of heart, impulsiveness, pity are not enough.
In the first legend
of the Grail, it is said that the Grail (the miraculous stone vessel which satisfies all
hunger by virtue of the consecrated host) belongs to the first comer who asks
the
guardian of the vessel, a king three-quarters paralysed by
the most painful wound: “What are you going through?”
The love of our
neighbour in all its fullness simply means being able to say to him: “What are you going through?” It is a recognition that the
sufferer exists, not only as a unit in a
collection, or a specimen from the social category labelled
“unfortunate,” but as a man, exactly like us, who was one day stamped with a special mark by
affliction. For this reason it is
enough, but it is indispensable, to know how to look at him
in a certain way. This way of looking
is first of all attentive. The soul empties itself of all its own contents in order to receive into itself the being it is
looking at, just as he is, in all his truth.
According to some legends the Grail was made of a single
stone, in colour like an emerald. Only he who is
capable of attention can do this.
So it comes about that,
paradoxical as it may seem, a Latin prose or a geometry problem, even though they are done wrong, may be of great service one
day, provided we devote the right kind of effort to them. Should the occasion arise, they can
one day make us better able to give someone in affliction exactly the help required to save him,
at the supreme moment of his need.
For an adolescent,
capable of grasping this truth and generous enough to desire this fruit above all others, studies could have their fullest spiritual
effect, quite apart from any particular religious belief.
Academic work is one
of those fields which contain a pearl so precious that it is worth while to sell all our possessions, keeping nothing for
ourselves, in order to be able to acquire it.
* * * * * * * * * * *
This essay is reprinted from Waiting on God by
Simone Weil published by Fontana Books,
1959, pp. 66-76. It is translated by
Emma Crauford from the original French (L’ Attente de Dieu) which was first
published in 1950. The first three footnotes have been added by Windhorst.
Jean Baptiste Racine (1639 - 1699) was
a French playwright.
The Curé of Ars, Jean-Baptiste-Marie
Vianney (1786 - 1859), found academic study extremely
difficult and failed in his first
attempt to pass the examinations necessary for entering seminary.
Nevertheless, his ability to teach
catechism and to counsel individuals became so well known
that up to twenty thousand people a
year came to see this parish priest in the final decade of his
life.
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